The incarnated desire

The Twin Flame

It is weird when you can feel someone, 

when they are not physically there... 

You can smell their scent...

You can feel their presence whenever you are alone.. 

You can sense their existence in your room all the time..

You could almost touch them...

If you wanted to..

You tell yourself that, it is just a fancy imagination and it is not really happening..

And when you do have something like that, 

It is really hard to tell the difference between reality and fantasies...

Your dreams become very clear about this specific person..

You have visions of him/her, which is as real as it could get.

Flashes of what he/she does now

You can easily feel some of the physical feelings he/she is experiencing right now...

That led me to thinking whether if it is a real thing?

Is it supernatural?

So I looked into this online and here is what I found...

Wikipedia said that there is something called a Twin flame concept...

Basically it means that sometimes the origin soul splits into two souls and those two souls long for each others whenever they are born creating a strong spiritual connection between those two souls.

It is a feeling of wholeness on a soul level... not on the usual physical level...

"A Twin flame is a spiritual (esoteric or New Age) concept describing a special soul connection between two souls. The twin flames are thought to be a template for an ancient/eternal type of relationship between lovers of any and all races or genders. The fundamental thought behind this concept is that the dawning new era in human spiritual evolution will be a time when relationships foster enhanced spiritual growth between lovers, whereas in previous times and still early in the 21st century couples stayed together for purposes of physical survival and economical safety more than anything else. According to the mythology of twin flames, in the beginning of time we were created from one source, that was split into smaller and smaller units down to two souls (and on rare occasions, halves of one soul) that would journey to Earth to learn and experience duality. They would reincarnate over lifetimes with this longing for each other."

So may be it is a soul connection and that, your real soul mate - not the ones we claim we have - is there, messed up the same you are, looking for you...

Experiencing those feelings definitely freak out people at the beginning, 

but as time goes by it gives you the feeling that you are not alone, 

that there is someone who is there whenever you are all alone...

Someone who plants serenity and tranquility in your heart and soul... 

You will get used to this later on, 

it will be as normal and easy as breathing..

It will be your special little thing that nobody believes you about... 

But you will adapt to it and it will be part of you..

  

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twin_flame

Running

Running...

Breathing heavily... 

Running...

Can't see where she's heading...

Everything's blurring up..

Everything fades in dust... 

It's like she is walking on shaky grounds..

Everything is falling apart...

Nothing is in her sight ...

There is no where to go...

Will this rumble settle?

Will there be sun at the end?

Will she be able to see the light?

Will she make out anything out of the dust?

Running...
Panicking.. 

Breathing gets harder and harder...

She dreams of taking a deep, calm breath...

She is struggling for life... 

She just can't stop because she'll die if she does... 

Running... 

Sweat is all over her body and chest.. 

Running... 

She prays to God that it stops... 

What a Life!

What if the world was still the same since the time before man landed his feet on it...

Mmmmm

For me,, 

I think I would prefer to live somewhere by water,,

By the sea side... In a cave may be.. 

Where I could wake up everyday to the rhythm of sea waves 

crashing on the shore.. 

and there might be the sound of the wind blowing into a nearby field... 

Making the green leaves and grass move and join the melody of the sea waves steady rhythm.

It is amazing when anyone could wake up everyday by this enchanting natural music.

I would sit by the sea,, 

Have a simple breakfast by the sea, may be a coconut milk drink.. 

Smelling the fresh air and enjoying the quietness and relaxation..

By noon I would go sailing to get my lunch... 

And may be swim a little.. 

Returning to land, after catching what I would eat... I might just go for a walk in the field next to where I'd live.. 

Gathering some crops, may be some corn and berries.. 

Then sit under a tree to have lunch by the time the sun sets... On the beach...

And by night fall, 

I would lie next to my cave...

Watching the sky and stars all over ... While the sea waves are in the background... 

In such life, nature surrounds me everywhere,,, all I could see is vast areas and amazing sights.

Everything is intensified, and life is steady and having a slow rhythm, making everything more colorful and meaningful... 

Mmmm... 

What a life... 

Belonging

It feels really bad when you have something inside you and you can not really describe it to anyone, not even to yourself,,, and you can not take it out..

You don't even know what this is..
It is weird and you never felt like this before...

You try and try...
May be a hug will do?

Sometimes it does, and sometimes it does not.
Does it depend on the person giving you the hug?
May be it is not the hug itself that makes a difference, may be the feeling of belonging it creates,,,

Yes, I think this is it.

Belonging...

When you feel you belong to someone or somewhere... 

Like being connected and linked to this person or place.

You're attached...
It is not always a good thing, attachment..

But it is a small price you pay if you have to compare it to belonging...

Belonging... Hmmmm....
The word itself has a good effect.

Belonging is never finding yourself alone. 

Always having a way to share things, yourself, your dreams, even sharing your nonsensical talks without any kind of thinking, boundaries or walls..

Belonging is never worrying about the future, knowing that you will never get lost. 

It is like standing on solid ground... 

Having an origin point to your core..

Serenity and safety are results of the feeling of belonging...
It fills up the void inside..
Belonging is finding home...

Suffocating

Darkness is around her... 

Deep inside, she is scared...

She wants to run, but she knows no where... 

Panic takes over, and her face is calm... 

She walks down the dark road... with no light at the end... 

She is looking for a familiar face,,, to calm her riving soul.. 

Air gets thinner by every passing moment..

She can't breathe... 

She looks around with pleading eyes,, she is searching... anyone?! HELP!

She feels she is drowning in the air... 

With no one watching... No one there... 

He is looking for her.

He had a dream that he had to find her.. and something told him she is there... 

His breath getting hastier by every step he takes...

Suffocating as she goes...

He spots her... 

Watching from a distance... 

He sees through her and he knows she's scared... 

Her uncertain, pained path is interrupted by his glorious soul...

She has her eyes on him... 

All she could see is light...

He holds her in his embrace.. 

Everything is going to be alright, he says...

Tears are pouring from her eyes... 

He hugged her tighter…

To calm her soul... 

It is like the emptiness inside her was nothing... Like it never existed.. 

She feels safe... 

She could breathe again... 

Her soul is serene.

She had him… 

He is her protecting shield…

His scent is all she could breathe…

It is all she needs…

He raps his arms tighter around her…

She dozes into his presence, his embrace…

Feeling safe,,,

She closes her eyes...

Still in his arms…

And like a baby, she goes to sleep…

Shades...

As I was walking around on the sidewalk..... I saw some children playing.. Yelling and cheering... A little boy crying over a toy.. To his dad..
A mother walking taking the hand of her little girl who is barely at the length of her knees.. And who was looking at the world with such wonder in her eyes...

All I could think of is, how it is like to be a child...

Childhood is the forever kingdom, a kingdom where everything and anything is possible... The one place that nobody dies..
Everything is new... Everyday is Christmas..

Childhood is not being able to sleep the night before we go to the beach because of the overwhelming happiness..

Pure feelings..
Bold dreams...
The world by then is full of colours, sparks and joy...

Turning my sight from this colorful picture and gazing at the adults on the very same sidewalk...

All I could see is lost faces... Emotionless features.. Cold eyes... 

Shades... Walking, hurrying to catch something.. May be late for work, or late for some kind of commitment they have in their lives... May be catching nothing? Running chasing a mirage?

What happens through their lives to make them shift from being so colorful and playful to blacks and whites,,,

Responsibly may be?
Burdens of life? Bills?

I keep thinking hard of what makes people look like empty shells when they grow up..
I thought it might be responsibilities, may be putting food on the table, personal burdens and pains, the long journey of chasing dreams.. Losses...

May be because now they know that not everything is possible,,,
Not every where you look is light..
No more easy sparks,,,

May be because they realized that there is death and loss.. 

And that everything comes to an end... 

Not what they thought as children where everything just goes on and on...

Or may be these people I have seen are just tired and tomorrow they will be fine, 

I just caught them in a bad moment.. Who knows?

I decided to let that matter go, because I will never be able to tell what was the reason of the black and white versions I just witnessed..

Days later, I looked at myself, saw my reflection in the mirror ... 

And I am froze in my place as my picture was just shades... 

Just like the ones on the street..