The beacon of light

I was listening the other day to a piece of music that reminded me so much of someone...
The music was so strongly composed...
Moving forward, and rich...
Yet at some point, it has a touch of emotion and sadness..

I don't know...
This is how I felt it was...

This piece of music made me feel like I want to keep this person all the time cherished and loved.. For the rest of my life...

After all, I know what this person had to endure for me..
What they managed to overcome to become what they are..
What they had to forgive of my own personal mistakes, that affected them personally, directly or indirectly...

Regardless to all the difficulties they had to face in the world....
They still smile!

How can a person carry the whole weight of the world on his own shoulders and still have the capability of smiling??!!
Not just smiling, it is not... But actually the ability to transfer and infect others with the same exact smile and what's more.. HOPE...

Strong.. Like a mountain...
Inspiring...
Hope giver...
Supporter..
Respectful...
Caring...
And above all, happiness and comfort infectious.

If you ever had this person in your life (few or just one), never let go of them.. For they are the beacon of light to everyone around them...

I am just lucky and blessed to have  this amazing bright spot in my life...


P.S.  Here is the piece of music I mentioned above, I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z01N1V4quTw&feature=youtu.be

The Paper Cutter

I held out my hand today 

And with the other hand I held a paper cutter.. 

I stared for more than five minutes at both..

I started pressing on my veins with the paper cutter... 

Made a small cut...

There is nothing in life that is so urging to continue breathing.

Colorless,,, tasteless world.

Nothing is tempting me to stay...

The purpose of life?

Thought a lot about it, still thinking though

I am trying hard to get to a compelling reason to be here... Breathing...

Am I considered really alive if I breathe but not mentally here?
If my heart is pounding but my soul is elsewhere?
If I do not have any more dreams?
If everything smells and tastes the same?
If it is always night?

I really don't know...

On the other hand, if I let the paper cutter do the work I want it to do...
What will happen on the other side...
What happens if I die?
Another phase of endless nights, may be?
Eternal silence and emptiness.
Hell?

Figured out that with the paper cutter is somehow like without it.
Limbo... Emptiness...
It is only a matter of phases.
This phase is the living world, the next one, who knows?

So I decided to put the paper cutter down
and face this world, for now...